Thursday, April 19, 2007


To finish one story arc, I miscarried on Tuesday. To finish another, I also finished working on Tuesday (and because of the miscarriage, it was one odd day, let me tell you). Just so everyone officially knows too much information about our life, Avram and I aren't planning to wait a while to get pregnant again, because I want Lydia and the hopeful next sibling to not be very far apart in age, and now they will at least be 24-25 months apart, if not a lot more. That's what bothers me about the miscarriage the most; all of that wasted time and effort, and nothing to show for it (except for a greater understanding of the plan of Salvation and the atonement and the Lord's timing, which, upon reading over, is actually quite a lot of things to show). But still no baby, which is what I want.
I thought I was having a boy last time, but now I want a girl next, because if we have a baby sometime from March through May, she'll be able to perfectly wear all of Lydia's clothing, which means we'll have that perfectly down. Perfect, yes?
Camilla came down yesterday and helped me pack, organize my packed boxes, and most endearing, did my dishes. Many people think the way to a woman's heart is to compliment her children. Although I do like it when people adore Lydia, the way to make me love you forever is to do my dishes. I don't know what this says about me; perhaps I have deficient motherhood genes. Or maybe even more deficient dish-washing genes, and so those ones win out.
Well, my ruminating writing has petered out for the morning, so I will sign off.


  1. Thora that is something that bothered me alot about losing Taylor and then the subsequent miscarriage. The wasted time...Porter would have been 15 months older than Taylor, 25 months older than the miscarriage, and he ended up being 27 months older than Theo. I always wanted closer children but like you said its not always in our control. I hope you can get pregnant quickly. I love you! And i show that love by washing all your dishes... what that says about me who know!! LOL

  2. I can't say I'm glad the miscarriage happened--but I am. What I really mean to say is I'm sorry it was necessary to happen but since it was, I'm glad that is now behind you and Camilla was there to help you. Were you at work when you actually miscarried?

  3. Thora, you astound me! (in a good way). May you be blessed with many children. Don

  4. All five of my daughters were 24 - 30 months apart. Didn't seem to keep them from enjoying each other's company. I hope you find the same is true in your family.