Monday, May 10, 2010

Mother's Day, and Weird Pregnancy Thoughts

Time to pop in for now what has become my bi-weekly family update. First off, I had a great Mother's Day. How did this happen? Mostly because during the week before Mother's Day, Avram asked me what I specifically wanted to happen on Mother's Day so I felt special and loved. In previous years, I've never made it clear what I would like before hand, and so basically every time, we ended up with me unhappy at some point in the day, when my visions weren't matching up with reality.

This time, via my instruction, Avram had the kitchen clean, and I had made an effort for the rest of the house to be clean, to start Mother's day with, since for me a clean house is restful in and of itself. Then, he had prepared a breakfast Strata (ok, casserole, but that's what the recipe in Joy of Cooking called it) that we'd picked out together, and I also had a fruit salad that I'd made the day before. I'm the only person in the family who likes fruit salad, so this was an exciting thing for me. Plus our Bishop cancelled all of the meetings besides the three hour block, and so Avram, instead of having a meeting at 8:30 in the morning before church, and then another meeting after church, was home with me all day long. So he got up with the girls, and let me sleep in a little, then we had our great breakfast, and then we moseyed along to church at our slow pace, and still arrived a half hour early (I think because we're so used to being at church for forever, it didn't seem real to only need to be there for three hours).

Lydia stood up with the Primary, and although she didn't exactly sing, as is common for Sunbeams, she didn't cry, or abandon the stand, either. And Avram and I nodded encouragingly at her, and smiled reassuring smiles for all we were worth, and I felt as proud as could be as a mother. Lydia can be very shy sometimes, and so we'd been prepping her all morning for standing with them, to avoid what happened at our ward talent show. This show happened shortly after Lydia entered Primary, early this year, and the Primary stood up and sang a song for the show. Lydia stood up with them, but had never practiced the song before, and within seconds looked like this.
If you click on the picture, you'll see her bright red face, and then she started hyper-ventilating, and came back mid-song, and in tears told us that she didn't know the song they were singing. So you can see our absolute joy in her staying with the Primary - it's a real step forward.

And Lydia made me a card, under Avram's tutelage, although when I woke up, the first thing she asked me was to help her finish the card - flattering, that even in making a present for me, she asks me for help.

Then we spent the afternoon and evening on the phone with various mothers, and Elisheva even sat on her little potty (her idea) for a half hour or so, excited as can be. Nothing happened, not that I thought it would, but still, maybe all this socializing will pay off sooner than later. And Avram told me that for Mother's Day he's getting me (him) a headset for the phone. It's for me, because when he talks on the phone to family, which he does often, he can't multi-task, since he hates the feeling of holding the phone on with his ear. Now, he'll be able to do dishes, and cook, and clean and parent, all while still talking on the phone. I requested this present, actually, and I'm very excited he's getting it.

Otherwise we're doing great. Elisheva got her cast off, and only took three days to start walking, instead of the week or two they said was common for not walking. She also turned two years old, and has started saying words even more often, although no sentences besides "Sit Down" or "Read this" and other imperatives.

I'm 34 1/2 weeks (but who's counting, really?) I spent the last two pregnancies with morbidity abounding in my thoughts, but this pregnancy I've been fine - until recently, when I keep feeling that I might have a premature baby. She's quickly running out of time to be pre-mature, and just like my worries about death with Elisheva or Lydia never materialized, I'm pretty sure this is just another phantasm of pregnancy.

In a weird moment - that will only make sense if you visit the link above - I was telling Avram about how I haven't worried about death this time, except for that one day I was feel a little morbid, and I was holding Elisheva and kissing her, and feeling sentimental, and then at that exact moment IZ's "Over the Rainbow" came on Pandora (Camilla, this is an Internet Radio station place you design yourself, and it's free) that we were listening to, and then I started to cry. The universe should not pull such tricks on me.

Mostly, though, with this pregnancy, I keep having scenarios flash through my mind, especially at night, of going into labor, or my water breaking, and who could we call for the girls, and such. Of course, the average baby weight now is 4 3/4 pounds, and I just looked on baby center to get the weight, and they said 99% of babies born at this point survive. So I'm not worried about the baby's health as much as the surrounding logistics. And I'll be honest, sometimes on a hard pregnancy day, I secretly wish I could just go into labor right now, and get the whole thing over with.


  1. Sounds a lot like my mother's day. The thing I appreciated most was sleeping in! It's a rare treat. That and having Paul home with me all day. He has those early morning meetings too, and so it's nice to have the occasional break.
    Oh, and in answer to your question, my mother-in-law gave us her old set of Max the Cat books. I looked it up on Amazon though, and it still exists. Here's the link:
    I'm still trying to figure out what the next set should be. Do you remember? Good luck keeping that baby in for another 2 1/2 weeks. :) You can do it!

  2. I've gotta tell you, I LOVE Lydia in primary. It's like she just gets it. She gets it.

  3. I like your posts even though they don't come as often (although that makes it more feasible to keep up on them). I used to pregnancy dream that I would wake up and the baby would be there--somehow me having slept through the whole process of labor and delivery. Showed my feelings on the subject. Never happened, however.

  4. I keep forgetting you're pregnant. Oh, my. A new little Thora soon (because that's what they all are in my mind--not little Shannons or little Avrams. Even if it was a boy, I think in my mind it would be a Baby
    Boy Thora.) Oh, how I miss you. Speaking of morbidity in pregnancy, I think I probably pass into that category when I think of the first half of my pregnancy as "I could have a miscarriage" and am excited to get to the second half that I think of as "I could not have a miscarriage anymore--it would be a stillbirth now."
    Just thought your minimal misery might like some mental company. (I put in the "mental" qualification to make it clear that I do not, at this moment, actually think I am pregnant at all.)

  5. It doesn't help that almost every baby in the ward (10 or so) has come 2 weeks early. Seems more rare that a baby has come on time or late. I know exactly how you feel about wanting your baby to come. You know that it's best for them to stay in and keep developing but, at the same time want them out while yu knoe they're still alive. That how I was with Milo.
    I was just telling Isabella this morning that you were going to have your baby soon.
    Please know that you can call me and I will watch your darlings or help in ANY way that you need.

  6. Pookie! I love you! I am glad your mothers days was great! Mine was too! I cryed when lily sang with the primary. she did such a good job. That is one thing about motherhood I have always dreamed about. And as far as the morbid thougths go, well I had that a bit with kelle, but this time its the c section. I dream about it almost every night, in great graphic detail. It torments me and i hate it. I wish that I could go into labor like the day befor my c section, and have it be such a fast progressive labor that my Dr would not be able to stop it and then I could avoid the c section. oh and also that that could happen and have no risk to me or my baby. but thats not going to happen, and I will be dreaming about it till the very end. uhg how depressing is that? sorry. You said to tell you "every niggling thought", so I did. :) we are almost there. the end is in sight. You can do it!

  7. So, let's see, now you're 36.5 weeks?

    I've never felt really ready for one of my babies to be born (although I was really, really ready to not be pregnant any more) and it's probably because I just have too high of expectations--but then everything ends up going fine.

    Hang in there!