The Twins' Birth Story
I started this post last year, and although I haven't written any birth stories since Athena's, I wanted to finish and publish it. It was my most unique birth experience, and although wasn't a beautiful birth like I had with some of my kids, it was the one I was most grateful for. After losing Torvald, and not finding out he had died until I was in premature labor in the hospital, I especially knew what a liminal space birth is. I was anxious the entire pregnancy that something would happen at the end of my pregnancy or in labor and delivery to lose these babies as well. Thankfully it was a pretty straight forward birth, all things considered and now we have delightful two-year-olds to love on every day.
In April in 2023, at seven months pregnant, I failed a couple of stress tests at my Doctor’s office. The first time, on April 18, they sent me straight to Labor and Delivery at the hospital for extended monitoring. When I asked if I could stop by my husband’s work and pick him up first, I was told I needed to go straight to the hospital. I cried the whole (very short) drive there, with all the worst case scenarios running through my mind. I knew logically that whatever caused Torvald to die was not happening with the twins (despite extensive genetic testing they never did figure it out, but the symptoms he had were not present with these babies), but logic doesn’t help much when you are petrified of losing more babies.I got checked in and into a gown and in my own room - it felt like I was arriving to actually have the babies, with an extra massive side of terror.
(My “hotel” room)
Avram came from campus and met me there, and by that point the babies were clearly alive and moving and therefore it was like a ghost town with no nurses or doctors anywhere to be seen. We hung out for a couple of hours and then got sent home.
The second time I failed, a half week later, I was sent to the high risk Maternity outpatient floor in the same hospital, where once again the babies were fine but hard to monitor. After the second time my doctor’s office told me from now on I was going to be preemptively doing all my testing at the Maternal Feta Medicine office. By this point no one thought I was going to reach full term. Twin babies are often born early, but I hoped to make it to May, where we had no birthdays in our family.
(My last picture while pregnant, on April 17 at 31 weeks pregnant. I don’t carry far out because I have a long torso, but that just means the babies were all in my rib cage and pelvis. My uterus measured 46 weeks pregnant at my last doctor’s appointment, when I was 31 weeks pregnant at the time! )
Everything about this pregnancy had been different than my others. Not only was I morning sick (all day and night sick) the whole time, but my maternal care was different as well. I had always seen nurse certified midwives (and delivered in hospitals) for every other pregnancy. I had had unmedicated labors for seven of my kids, while I got an epidural with Torvald. He was also the only one delivered by a doctor in the hospital - until these twins. The midwives I had seen had a doctor group as part of the same practice, so I began seeing the doctors.
Twins are delivered in the OR, and I was required to get an epidural for delivery in case they needed to switch to an emergency c-section in the middle of delivery (more common with twins! Yay!) So much more can go wrong with a twin delivery. I didn’t really care about getting an epidural nor delivering in the OR. I have had beautiful labors in water and quick deliveries accompanied by midwives (or in the case of Gareth, the head nurse, but that is another story). I prefer being able to move around and keep my options open with unmedicated labors, plus I had liked avoiding any potential complications if the epidural goes wrong. But for these babies all I wanted most of all were living babies and secondly no c-section if it was at all avoidable.
Rowena as baby A, and thus on the bottom, kindly moved head down early and therefore we could plan on a vaginal delivery as long as Artemis didn’t get too much bigger than her. Every doctor I talked to told me I was a good candidate for vaginal delivery of twins, by which they meant I had delivered many babies with no issues so they weren’t worried about them getting stuck or anything. Artemis stayed transverse the whole pregnancy - she took up most of the space in the womb while poor Rowena was squished down in a small corner. The doctors were fine with delivering Artemis breech, so it was alright she was not head down.
We picked out names by the third trimester. Knowing that it was highly likely that they would come early and once they were born would be whisked away to the NICU (which is exactly what happened) I wanted them to already be named. Normally we like to spend a day getting to know our new baby before naming them, but I was sure that wouldn't be an option this time. When I first found out I was pregnant with twins I had no idea how we would name them in utero, especially when we later found out they were both girls. However, they were both so completely different that it was no issue at all to pick which name went with which girl. I couldn't physically differentiate their movements inside of me, but I could feel their spirits and their energies. Rowena was softer and more classically feminine, and Artemis was more active and a stronger personality. Knowing that it was very clear who got what name. We named Baby A Rowena Isis Ruth and Baby B Artemis Mary Nephthys. We wanted to do both biblical middle names and Egyptian ones. Isis and Nephthys are sisters in Egyptian mythology.
Around 3:45 am on April 25 I woke up to Rowena’s water breaking. My water has broken first with three previous babies, so I knew immediately and we started proceeding to the hospital. My labor didn’t start at the same time, but of course with early twins and the fast labors I have had once they do start had us leaving to the hospital as soon as possible. Thankfully we lived just five minutes from the hospital, so by 4:30 (ish? I am making up the time here) we arrived and started going through check-in. They got me into the room I would labor in and hooked me up on a monitor. I was having contractions, but they were irregular and not painful yet. They also checked to see how dilated I was, but for the life of me I cannot remember where I was.
I wasn’t sure if they would be stopping my labor, like they did when I first went into preterm labor with Torvald at 30 weeks, but after awhile I was told they would not be, and I would be delivering my babies that day. So far the doctor had not come - it was the end of a shift and he was at a different hospital finishing a delivery. I kept telling my nurse that what I really needed was an epidural the second my labor started, because my labors go fast and it needed to be in place for delivery. The one epidural I had had had not slowed down my labor in the slightest, and I was sure it would be the same this time as well. With all of the extra risks and two babies, many more things can go south in a twin delivery, and I wanted everything squared away.
We were basically waiting around until six would be both the doctor and nurse change, so hopefully things would fall into place more at that point. Right at six something did fall into place - I had my first real contraction. I knew then I was on a tight time schedule until delivery. Avram and I waited for a few more contractions just to make sure they were regular and they were. He tried contacting the nurse and getting her in there, but with the shift change the nurses didn't come to the room until 6:20. Being under strict orders to get the epidural, and knowing my labor would proceed quickly, I immediately asked them to get the anesthesiologist. Labor is easy (ish), but getting the epidural in place in time felt hard because so much of it was out of my control. I still hadn't met the doctor on duty yet, either.
Eventually the anesthesiologist made it to my room (it felt like forever) and he was placing the epidural by about 7:00 and it was in by around 7:10-7:15. It didn't take complete effect at first, and so they had me lie on my side to try and get it to fully work. The doctor finally came in around this same time, and it was the same doctor who had delivered Torvald and was supposed to deliver Gareth, but didn't make it in time to the hospital (I told the hospital when I arrived and was informed that the midwife was sick and it would be a doctor delivering me that if he wasn't already in the building he wouldn't get there in time, and that the head nurse would deliver my baby. I was right on all accounts). It was nice to have that continuity, and with delivering twins it wasn't like he was going to be going anywhere else, either.
They checked me again at 7:20 and I was at 9 cm after an hour and 20 minutes of active labor. Suddenly everything started moving quickly. Thankfully the epidural had begun working everywhere, because it was go time. They preemptively gave me some tylenol at 7:30 (I don't even remember why), and Avram ran to the bathroom before we went to the OR. Well, they moved me so fast after the tylenol, that he had to run and meet us in the OR. I didn't even notice because it was such a big production, moving me in the bed down the hall and straight into the OR. By 7:35 I was in the OR, and the room started filling up with people all bustling around doing their things.
Avram took these pictures at 7:38 am
Suddenly I felt something. Was I crowning? Was a baby falling out? Who knew! I just felt something. They lifted up my hospital gown, and Rowena's entire head was already out. I hadn't pushed even once, but she was just falling out of me. They hadn't even set up the bed for pushing or delivery, but it didn't even end up mattering. At 7:40 she was fully birthed. She wasn't born breathing and although I had wanted to wait to cut the cord they needed to get her resuscitated so they whisked her away to the room next door.
Avram took this picture of Rowena in the room next door at 7:52 am, 12 minutes old.
The doctor had another doctor with him, and he was teaching her about twin delivery and external cephalic version (moving the baby head down by manipulating the outside of your uterus). It felt tense to me and like it was taking a long time to move Artemis head down. He also reached up inside of me and attempted to move her head down that way as well. (Thankful for the epidural right then!)
Artemis was resisting all attempts to move her head down and although the doctors never seemed worried, after Torvald I don't think I would have felt relieved until Artemis was actually born and alive. Avram was standing at my head, and I asked him to go into the room with Rowena, ostensibly to be there with her. Mostly I just knew he was also anxious, and looking at him reminded me of how anxious I was. He left and around then I heard her start crying which was a beautiful sound. Meanwhile the doctors had given up on getting Artemis head down and moved straight to plan B - breech delivery. He moved her so she was feet first and then broke her water and pulled her out. (She had bruises on her ankles for weeks). Artemis also wasn't born breathing. The doctor let her stay attached to the placenta for thirty seconds, he counted it out, and then they quickly cut her as well and took her to the other room to get her resuscitated.
Artemis at 7:55 am, in the same side room
Once they got Rowena stabilized enough they brought her out to show her to me. She was all wrapped up like a baby burrito and with a hat on her head, so all I could see was a little, red scrunched up face. I gave her face a quick kiss (I didn't even get to hold her), and then they whisked her away to the NICU and oxygen.
My little baby Rowena I kissed
I didn't even get to see Artemis because she needed a C-Pap machine to breathe so was taken straight to the NICU on it.
I hadn't seen Rowena when she was born at all, and Artemis was just a little red blob at the end of the bed. It wasn't anything like any other birth I had gone through, but I was just so grateful that they were here and alive.
I had hemorrhaged with Torvald's birth, and twin births are already a higher risk for hemorrhaging, so they gave me a shot of Pitocin in my thigh and then also gave me a ton of Pitocin through an IV. Pitocin can help stop hemorrhaging. Surprisingly, but thankfully, I did not hemorrhage at all. They returned me to my laboring room and I spent a few hours doing the immediate recovery from birth. Once my epidural had worn off, and I was completely clear from hemorrhaging, they moved me to a recovery room. It was weird being post-birth, but without my babies.
After a few hours Avram and I were able to go up to the NICU to see the girls. Artemis wasn't able to be held yet because she wasn't stable enough, but I did get to hold Rowena for a few moments. Rowena was just 4 lbs 4 oz at birth, and Artmis 4 lbs 11 oz. Rowena was the smallest baby I have ever held, and it was surreal to be holding my 32 week daughter. We couldn't really see what Artemis even looked like under the huge c-pap, and wondered if the girls might be identical after all. (Spoiler, they are completely and absolutely not identical).
Then after a brief visit it was back on the recovery floor, alone again. Late afternoon we got to go up again and I got to hold Artemis briefly for the first time. Avram graciously let me do the first holdings, and didn't get to hold them himself until the next day. Neither were stable enough at first to get held more than briefly.
Artemis was taking a small break from the c-pap at this point.
I spent that night in the hospital, and the next day consisted of more visits up to the NICU. I never sleep well in hospitals, and have never spent more that one night in them after having a baby because of that, so the next evening I got released and visited the girls on my way out. Avram was coming to pick me up, and so until he arrived I got to help in the girls' first baths. It tired me out even doing that much, but it was nice to be involved with them. Their first day was in the higher risk side of the NICU, but by the second day they were moved to the lower risk side, which was exciting. Artemis was also taken off of the c-pap and just put on high flow oxygen, so we could actually see her, and get to hold her more.
The next morning I couldn't sleep, and so I got up around six and by seven am I was back in the NICU, ready for my first day as a NICU mom. They were surprised I was back already, but I couldn't imagine staying home when I could see my baby girls, here and healthy (ish).
Two days post delivery and feeling human for the first time in seven months
With seven other kids and recovering from birth I couldn't spend all of my time in the NICU, but I would go there for 3 to 6 hours every day. Occasionally I would go twice in one day. I knew that I needed to recover and retain my strength, and not burn out by being in the NICU day and night. Later that same day after being released Avram and I even went to a fancy lunch on campus that we had made previous reservations for.
It was actually really nice to be out together, while knowing that our babies were in the best (and most expensive) babysitting service ever. One thing that comes with parenting nine kids is perspective. Even though we would have rather had had the babies full term and with no health problems, we tried to find the silver lining like easy dating until they came home.
Rowena Artemis
The first good photos of the girls and first family photos, taken April 26 when they were one day old.
Their NICU journey is another whole story, but Artemis came home after 3 1/2 weeks, and Rowena after around 70 days. We couldn't bring Artemis back into the NICU after she was released, so the girls were completely apart for over a month. Heartbreaking. We called the NICU baby jail, and when we passed the hospital (which was often) we would wave to Rowena in baby jail.
Once Rowena's nurse held her up in a window so they could be near each other. Every time I see this picture my heart breaks all over again remembering those days. Rowena couldn't learn how to eat, and that was what kept her there for so long. Of course, that wasn't the end of the story, since she came home on an ng tube and eventually got a g-tube. Now she fully eats and doesn't have any tube feedings, but it has been a long road to get here!
Having twins in the NICU, and then having separated twins with one in the NICU is not an experience I would ever want to repeat, but I am just so glad that they are here and healthy and a part of our family. I am so grateful that nothing went wrong with their delivery, and that I got to have a vaginal birth and even that Rowena's g-tube is almost done. She is in her trial period now, where she isn't on any formula or water through it, and should be able to get it taken out in August.
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