Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Star Fleet, Please Take Note of this Duly Registered Complaint

I'm labouring under the crushed ego that no one left a comment on my bread post on my cooking blog. I even (I hope) fixed its technical difficulties, so it should all show up now. But, like the pioneers of old, I shall forge ahead, despite my faltering self esteem.

Let's talk about a pet peeve I have.

As I have mentioned before, Avram and I have taken up Start Trek watching. We're two thirds of the way through the first season, and although in the main I quite enjoy it, there is one aspect I cannot abide. It's important, and all pervasive - the lack of seatbelts.

It's killing me. Sure, I understand that they're cruising through space, known for it's wide open spaces. And that they are one a peaceful mission, so they shouldn't need them in case of war. But nary an episode passes when somewhere, somehow, they are violently thrown out of their seats. In the movies, people died from this activity. In the TV show, the death allowance of 2 men per show is saved for the landing parties, so they cannot waste mortality to let you know just how dangerous a work it is to be on the bridge - without a seatbelt.

It has reached the point when, yet again, Kirk and his gang fall to the floor Avram tells me he doesn't want to hear it, before I even get my mouth open. I cannot resist commenting on it every single time. Even when Avram tells me that he's already heard this gripe the last 2,038 times it happened. I just have keep saying my piece, and hope that eventually the Star Trek designers will hear me, and install some seat belts already.

There is a point in the movie Generations when the Enterprise is crash landing on a planet - a function it was never meant to perform, since it was built and operates in space only. As they are burning through the atmosphere one of the crew, Geordi perhaps, yells out, "Brace yourselves!" And they do, they brace themselves by madly grabbing a hold of whatever dashboard or chair handles they can find. While crash landing. From the sky. In what is definitely not a plane. And most, minus the obligatory two dead, survive, by only bracing themselves. Although, they are thrown around quite a bite, and one person, probably one marked to die, did an impressive flip over a console. If the Star Fleet had only learned from their historical records the number of men they had killed by their neglect, perhaps more lives could have been saved.

Avram and I are going to see the new Start Trek this Saturday - we'll see if in this alternate history Star Fleet listened to me.

Phew, I feel better now with that out of my system. And if you really love me, just pretend to look at my bread recipe, ok? It took me forever to post it, and my entire construct of adult homemaking self is built upon this recipe I invented. If at least one people doesn't falsely promise to try it out, or at least say something meaningless like, "Hey! You posted! A bread recipe!" then I may have to give up blogging, and start watching Star Trek full time. And then where would we all be? Wearing seat belts, I can only hope.

P.S. What are your pet peeves of the movie/TV show variety?

P.P.S. All this talk about buckling up makes me sound like a Mom. Next I'm going to be telling Star Trek to keep their hands to themselves, and if they can't stop poking (or in Kirk's case, ogling) their neighbor, to sit on their hands.

12 comments:

  1. And why isn't there a link from this post to your cooking post?

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  2. I put a link on - at the top, when I wrote bread post. Does it not show up? Am I delusional?

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  3. the site is thoraskitchen.blogspot.com

    It should be the top post.

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  4. Ha! I tend to get sucked in to annoying details like that.

    Lately I've been watching Pushing Daisies in the morning while I get dressed and keep thinking, "What if they want to have kids? Does body fluid make people dead again or is it just skin to skin contact?"

    The non-touching thing. So annoying.

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  5. i have not watched star trek or seen the movie. but that does sound anoying! I get hung up on things like that too and cory always tells me to just enjoy the show and SHHHHhhhhh but i cant help it!

    and i read your bread recipie. i have not tried it. sorry! I want to try it. I just need to grind some wheat first or i suppose go buy some whole wheat flower at the store.

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  6. I will probably try your recipe for my next batch. We still have to eat one loaf in the freezer from last time, though.

    I always thought the stumbling/bracing was part of the original series' charm. It always makes me laugh. I see it as kind of a running gag. :D

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  7. Wow! First of all, I love the bread post! It looks awesome! I really ought to get back into that, but that'll be after qualifying exams...

    Secondly, I must say I always appreciate running into a fellow Trek nit-picker. Some suspension of disbelief is required. My favorite nitpick though isn't from physics -- it's from English. Every single time they split the infinitive "To boldly go ..."! Oh well, maybe the laws of physics and grammar have changed by the 23rd century. Anyways, great post!

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  8. I'll spoil it for you: the alternate Enterprise doesn't have seatbelts, either.

    Dave and I are going through Star Trek as well. We're on Season 6 of TNG.

    (And it was Riker who said, "All hands brace for impact!!")

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  9. In defense of Trek (which, it must be said, is not so fine a franchise as StarWars, or even Dr Who) it should be said that it comes from a time in American history when people weren't concerned about seatbelts in cars, let alone space ships. Trek, you'll remember, debuted in 1966, just one year after Mr Nader published his alarmist little pamphlet.

    The other thing that I think I should point out is that the Enterprise is a spaceship (a ship, for all love, without her having masts or rigging!), a part of Starfleet, etc. and keeping with the nautical theme, we are intended to think of them as sailors. Truthfully, when was the last time you saw a seatbelt on a boat?

    I suppose Kirk could order manropes rigged, or, could have himself lashed to the helm, or something...

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  10. Okay, this totally cracked me up, Thora. I've watched all the various Star Trek shows and not a single one of them has any sort of restraining device for battles or crash landings. Ship analogies aside, there's an awful lot of flying over consoles that goes on over the course of the seasons! I half want to watch Star Trek again now just to take note of it, but we're wrapped up in a Doctor Who marathon right now.

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  11. The TARDIS - now there's another "ship" that doesn't have seat belts. Or seats it often seems.

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  12. Ha ha ha. I was reading someone's ode to Harley motorcycles today and went into a mom rant about how dangerous motorcycles are, so I relate. And you are SO RIGHT! I don't think I'll be able to watch Star Trek now.

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